Grief Sucks, Day 2
Aug. 29th, 2011 03:51 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gerisullivanReal sleep Saturday night came as a welcome relief. The big challenge of the noonish morning was getting dressed. I was all about comfort clothes today, but the more I looked in my closet and drawers for a comfort top, the more my heart and mind kept telling me that I haven't any comfort clothes that are up to this.
I ended up pulling a shirt in need of washing out of the roller bag that still needs to be unpacked before I turn around and pack it for this week's trip to Michigan. It was the shirt I wore Wednesday while Sue and I packed her Yukon with antique furniture and photos from Daddy's house, and I packed my car with the belongings I'd brought with me and the many Fitzgerald treasures that came home with me. More importantly, I was still wearing the shirt when I went up for my middle-of-the-night last long visit with Daddy. I'd meant for it to be a couple of hours, but it ended up being more like five. He was having a rough night of it and I helped calm, comfort, and care for him while also doing some much-needed client work. I continue to be extraordinarily grateful for wifi access in health care settings.
So. Yeah. The shirt. I'm still wearing it, so I guess it worked.
LJ and G+ comments, and the email messages of condolence and sympathy provided much more comfort than the shirt did. Likewise Gavi and Fred's presence. Many thanks to all of you for those.
Hurricane Irene didn't provide as much distraction as I hoped she would. It turns out I slept through the hardest rain and wind and I spent the afternoon waiting for the peak that turned out to be only a forecast rather than the reality.
The longer the day's gone on, the more like moving through molasses everything feels. I'm already getting impatient with myself, which is utterly ridiculous under the circumstances. Eating is going reasonably well; much better than the first 48 hours during some of my previous times of grief. I need to remember to keep the liquids flowing. I'm only halfway through my second Diet Coke of the day and I think I started the first one last night before I went to bed. There was coffee, but I didn't drink as much water as yesterday.
Various things that needed accomplishing got accomplished. Other things I would have liked to have made some progress on didn't get any time from me at all. But I survived the day and that is a Good Thing. Many thanks to all of you for helping make that possible, for helping ease my own way through it.
I ended up pulling a shirt in need of washing out of the roller bag that still needs to be unpacked before I turn around and pack it for this week's trip to Michigan. It was the shirt I wore Wednesday while Sue and I packed her Yukon with antique furniture and photos from Daddy's house, and I packed my car with the belongings I'd brought with me and the many Fitzgerald treasures that came home with me. More importantly, I was still wearing the shirt when I went up for my middle-of-the-night last long visit with Daddy. I'd meant for it to be a couple of hours, but it ended up being more like five. He was having a rough night of it and I helped calm, comfort, and care for him while also doing some much-needed client work. I continue to be extraordinarily grateful for wifi access in health care settings.
So. Yeah. The shirt. I'm still wearing it, so I guess it worked.
LJ and G+ comments, and the email messages of condolence and sympathy provided much more comfort than the shirt did. Likewise Gavi and Fred's presence. Many thanks to all of you for those.
Hurricane Irene didn't provide as much distraction as I hoped she would. It turns out I slept through the hardest rain and wind and I spent the afternoon waiting for the peak that turned out to be only a forecast rather than the reality.
The longer the day's gone on, the more like moving through molasses everything feels. I'm already getting impatient with myself, which is utterly ridiculous under the circumstances. Eating is going reasonably well; much better than the first 48 hours during some of my previous times of grief. I need to remember to keep the liquids flowing. I'm only halfway through my second Diet Coke of the day and I think I started the first one last night before I went to bed. There was coffee, but I didn't drink as much water as yesterday.
Various things that needed accomplishing got accomplished. Other things I would have liked to have made some progress on didn't get any time from me at all. But I survived the day and that is a Good Thing. Many thanks to all of you for helping make that possible, for helping ease my own way through it.
